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There’s nothing like motherhood to make you talk about poop.

Seriously, before you become a mom, do you ever really even think about poop, let alone talk about it in “mixed company”? Motherhood changes all that. You wind up saying things like “Are you poopie?’ and “Do you need to poop?” without a hint of self-consciousness.

So why am I talking about poop today? Well, I have one child who can’t poop, and one who can’t keep her poop in her pants.

A little background: I knew Emilia was sick, so I took off work on Monday to take her to the doctor. Ella woke up Monday morning saying she didn’t feel well. Because she wasn’t running a fever and seemed pretty chipper, I assumed she was faking and almost sent her to school. But since I was already taking Emilia in, I made an appointment for Ella, too.

The verdict? Emilia has, to quote the nurse practitioner, a “blazing” ear infection, and Ella has a distended bowel, which is causing a “rip-roaring” bladder infection. Six prescriptions and one OTC later, we now have a chart to keep track of who takes what when. (How do those people with 12 children manage—I only have two and can barely keep things straight.) And boy, do I feel guilty for thinking Ella was faking it.

Emilia’s antibiotic has resulted in three diaper explosions so far today. And the treatments for Ella’s bowel problem are not exactly pleasant, especially for an overly dramatic and sensitive six year old. (And apparently, if you were at the grade school early enough this morning, you got to hear all of the lovely details from Ella herself.) So on top of two physician copays and $90 at the pharmacy, it also cost me $25 in iTunes downloads to ensure Ella’s cooperation. (No, I am not above bribing my daughter.)

The good news is that they both seem to be feeling better today. The bad news? I have a feeling we’ll be dealing with poop for quite a while longer.

Would anyone like a free cat?

This is our cat Lily enjoying herself on the dining room table. I think we've kicked her off the table ten times today. Ryan removes her gently; I usually send her flying across the room.

I let her outside before I began typing this post; now, about one minute later, she's scratching to be let in. I think she'll just have to wait.

Yesterday I caught her in the crib, taking a nap with Emilia. She ran away before I could get the camera. (Yes, it's annoying. No, I don't worry that she'll steal the baby's breath.)

Now she just ran down the steps. She must have gotten the door open herself--she can do that. Sometimes she gets herself trapped between the screen and the door and has to meow until one of us rescues her.

Maybe once the snow melts she'll calm down?

Sunscreen

I'm not sure how I forgot to put sunscreen on Ella's face before I sent her out sledding. The picture doesn't show it very well; she wound up with the classic ski trip sunburn--white where her glasses protected her, with a red ring right below.

Snow Day

Our street is finally clear, so we could get out of the house if we were so inclined. We haven't ventured out yet, but it's empowering to know that we could.

Above are some pictures from the past two days. Ella played outside quite a bit. When she was inside, she used pillows from the couch to create, among other things, a house, a boat, and a cabin. Emilia did what she always does--eat, sleep, poop, and play.

Snow Ice Cream

After a few cups of much-needed coffee, I decided it was time for the snow day tradition of making snow ice cream. If you've never made snow ice cream before, you should try it today. Here's how.

Step 1: Wait for it to snow. This is the most important (and challenging) step. You can try to cheat and use shaved ice or your Snoopy Snow Cone Maker, but it's just not the same. Snow ice cream is one of those things that flies in the face of our instant gratification, consumer-driven culture, and that my friend, is the beauty of it. (That, and lots of cream and sugar.)

Step 2: Put out a bowl to catch clean snow.

Step 3: Mix up your ingredients. I used 2% milk, cream, sugar, and vanilla. You can also use whole milk or evaporated milk, but you want to stay away from skim milk. This is not a diet food. Mix it all up and fiddle with the ingredients until it tastes good. The more snow you have, the more stuff you need. It's not an exact science.


Step 4: Pour the milk mixture over the ice cream and mix it up. You don't have to use all of the snow.

Step 5: Serve and enjoy. I am a snow ice cream purist, so I believe it is wrong to add such distractions as hot fudge or chocolate sauce, but how you live your life is none of my business.

Now, the downside to this tradition is that my husband is asleep on the couch, Ella is sitting in her closet crying because she can't find the appropriate outfit for eating snow ice cream, and the baby is too young for dairy (and even I'm not crunchy enough to make her breast milk snow ice cream). So I am enjoying the snow ice cream alone, which kind of takes away from that whole family togetherness thing. Oh, well. More for me.

I should be asleep right now...

The ground is covered with snow, and the TV says there's more to come. School is canceled, so I should be slumbering blissfully (like my husband).

Instead, I'm awake and grouchy.

Emilia had a restless night to begin with. When we got the "no school" text at 5:15, she decided to wake up. At 5:30 Ella woke up, too. I managed to send Ella back to bed and finally got Emilia to sleep at 6:30.

At 7:00, in bounced a hungry Ella. Being the bad mommy that I am, I sent her to watch TV until I finally relented, got up, and made her breakfast. (I've really got to teach her to put her own waffles in the toaster. The real danger is that something could fall on her, causing a concussion, when she opens the freezer. If you've ever opened my freezer, you know this is not hyperbole.) By 8:00 Ella was bored.

So, like any bad mommy would do, I bundled her up and sent her outside to play in the snow, hoping for a few moments of peace. It worked for a while, until she started crying because her mittens were covered in snow. So I made her hot (okay, lukewarm) chocolate, put her in her PJs and sent her back to bed.

My socks are wet from snow droppings, and I'm going back to bed now. Wish me luck.

My baby is sooooo fat

Emilia is so fat...

How fat is she?

The back of her neck looks like a package of hot dogs.

She's got more rolls than a bakery.

Her cheeks have their own zip code.

No, seriously. This is how fat she is. We just got some clothes of Ella's back that Brandi had used for Anya and Ally. Emilia isn't even six months old yet. She can fit into clothes (size 12-18 months) that Ella couldn't wear until she was 18 months old.

I know, I know. Ella was a tiny little thing. The clothes have shrunk some because they've been washed so many times. Emilia will slim down once she starts moving.

But still.

Emilia is so fat that we met a dad a couple of weeks ago who said he was going to put his one-year-old boy on steroids so she couldn't beat him up!

Emilia is fat that strangers walk up to us in the mall to squeeze her cheeks.

Emilia is so fat that the brand new 6-12 months onesie I put on her yesterday is almost too small.

She's cute. She's healthy. She's fat.

Emilia's Favorite Toy

The rocker is okay.


The exersaucer is nice.

The jumparoo is lots of fun.


But the best toy of all?

The curtains above the diaper changing table.

Ella's Tooth

Ella lost her second tooth on Friday morning while we were in Derby. We keep forgetting to put it under her pillow so the tooth fairy can visit--hopefully we'll remember tonight.

The best thing about Spring Break? Sleep!

The weeks leading up to Spring Break were exhausting--with junior high quiz bowl, forensics, Daily Light Saving Time, and a baby with a cold, we were ready for a break. As soon as we finished parent teacher conferences on Friday, we loaded up and hit the road. First we headed to Hays, where Emilia got acquainted with Bennie.


Ella and Grandma Agnes visited Sternberg Museum, one of Ella's favorite places. We relaxed and helped Grandma and Grandpa pick out new flooring--they decided on light oak.

On Monday we loaded up again and made our way to Derby. We visited Aunt Brandi, Uncle Josh, and the girls. We helped Aunt Brandi go through toys (Emilia got to bring a bunch home!) and hold a garage sale. It was time to come home on Friday. Luckily, Emilia was a good little traveler. She slept most of the time we were on the road, which was wonderful. Ryan is pretty tired of being trapped in the backseat between two car seats, though! We spent today unloading and cleaning house. The weather here is beautiful, just a bit windy, so we also played outside. Monday we're back to school.

New Pictures

Here's a link to the pictures Trena took of the girls. We didn't really get a good one of the girls together (Ella was not cooperative), but there's some really cute pictures of them separately. Emilia looks like a little old man in quite a few of them. I couldn't find her headband, so you can really see her male pattern baldness.

We're in Wichita with Aunt Brandi right now. We'll post some Spring Break pictures when we get home.

Baby Bunnies

Happy Birthday, Ally!

Ally is 2!

We celebrated my niece Ally's second birthday on Saturday in Rolla.

Brandi made a cute cupcake cake.
Here's DJ Preston.


Grandpa Larry loved Ally's sock monkey.

At the New Playground

We have a new playground in town. I took Ella and her friend Reagan to play this afternoon, and the girls were actually willing to have their pictures taken. We also had Trena take pictures of the girls in their Easter outfits today after school, so in a few days, I should be able to put up a link to those pictures.

Our Little Reader

Emilia is already quite the little reader!

Ella's New Haircut

Ella has been trying to grow out her bangs, but ever since she gave herself a trim last month, they've been a mess. Tonight, she broke down and got bangs cut again. She really likes her new haircut.

Happy Birthday, Great Grandma and Great Grandpa Link!

We celebrated Great Grandma and Great Grandpa Link's birthdays in Rolla on Friday. Here's Grandma blowing out the candles on her birthday cupcakes.

Here's Grandpa blowing out the candles on his cake.

And here are the tumbleweeds at the swimming pool in Rolla. They're back....

Welcome to Our World

What are we up do these days? Emilia keeps getting bigger and bigger. She started eating solid foods after her four-month check up. She likes to eat rice cereal, bananas, pears, sweet potatoes, carrots, squash, and prunes. She's not too impressed with peas and applesauce, though.





Here's Ella feeding Emilia cereal.





Ella was the flower girl at homecoming, a job she took very seriously. Here's some pictures of her all dressed up.